When I was a young woman, I met an incredible person. She was an artist, a real artist. At twenty, I had not known an artist before. Her home was fascinating to me, her long grey hair and soft wrinkles as full of treasures as the rooms of her house. There were precious items coming through her and with her and because of her. Organic foods, candles that did not drip wax, musical instruments, hardwood floors, a mortgage for her and her son, and light that streamed in through the window sill in every season. Her name was as beautiful as she: Gloria Still.
One day, she explained, "I've written the most important poem of my life." She opened her hands, then closed finger to finger across her mouth. She would be published in The Iowa Review, the quintessential quarterly for literary artists who would receive Pushcart prizes, serious publication, state grants. Her connection to Source, to that which is greater than each of us alone, came front and center. Her ability to channel that which is greater than our imagination, her creativity now bonded in identity, made her forever changed.
Today, this is the most important jewelry of my life. Everything is for my daughter. Everything is a seance.
28 Pieces for Love; 28 Pieces for Christina
I've held onto each piece, every jewelry work created with the beautiful beads gifted to me from my BSBP7 partners, like a seamstress building her quilt; not quite ready, not quite ready but in time, as seasons change and children grow, adding patterns and weaves and squares. Singing and sewing late in the night. Quietly building a lifetime, and in one long sunrise, laying out the memories of a life: the soft brush of my baby's cheek against little giraffes on cotton, the second year and second pregnancy, two cribs and Winnie the Pooh, pastel pants and dresses softly faded, having been washed and hung on a clothesline with the smell of Dreft filling the backyard in the warm sun. Then stairsteps: three little girls, my little ducklings.
There are gardens full of vegetables, and little hands that pull green beans, point to huge beautiful orange blossoms on a vine: pumpkins beginning to grow.
There are tears blurring the lines of the building and the blue August sky as my first born little one goes off to Kindergarten, vanishes into the little school.
There are rebellious years: not my childrens' but my rebellion. My only care in all of life, to be a good mother no matter what that takes. I share love of education with my friend, another professor. We create our own schools for children. I homeschool my little ducklings, educate and empower my three beautiful daughters, myself.
Later, time full of laughter and love and years of friendship with my children, I make jewelry by myself. I watch The Bead Soup Parties from afar, taking in creations with awe. My grandchildren are homeschooled. I think there is something important about Lori's Bead Soup jewelry parties; premonitions now.
Last July, I finally gathered up my courage and joined in my first Bead Soup Blog party. Last July, my sweet daughter died. Everything I had ever believed became something now lived. My beliefs changed from thoughts to experiences; moving from my mind to my soul: death is not loss, but part of life. We are eternal. We are nonphysical first and forever.
Like a Holiday, I cannot not remember her death as I create for my second Bead Soup Party. What I do not know as I begin again: I will hold onto the beads and jewelry like memories.
This time, I have two partners. This time, there are finished focals, a preponderance of gemstone beads, silver treasures. Like gathering and building a quilt, I hold all close to my heart.
I hoard everything. I can't let go. Loss and mourning sneak up on me, leave me standing alone. Jewels and beads that have come to me on angels wings are cherished, and I sleep next to my beading table, wake to the sunlight illuminating the gifts from Nancy Smith and Pam Hurst. Forever in my heart, their art comforts and inspires me.
Today, I find the courage to move forward, to share my BSBP7 reveal. I finally find words and breathe. I hope Pam & Nancy forgive me for taking so long, for vanishing from the party, runing into the dark night, looking for my daughter, still & quiet, like a deer in the woods.
I create jewelry with memories. I create designs with the dead. Each turn of my tools feels like an honor. I treasure each item and each moment. Everything never-ended.
Still I hold on. I don't let go. I can't post.
This is the most important jewelry I've ever made; the hardest to ever share. Everything is for my eldest daughter. One piece for each year of life. Everything is a seance.
28 Pieces for Love
Metal Me This Etched Caps
Chainmaille with Aluminum and Niobium, Czech glass
Lea Avroch Lampwork, Vintage Czech, Spiral Weave
Sterling Silver Charms, Green Onyx, Handcrafted lampwork,
Handmade Half-Persian chainmaille chain
(I helped with tutorial: PBS Beads Baubles & jewels)
Handmade Half-Persian chainmaille chain
(I helped with tutorial: PBS Beads Baubles & jewels)
Jasper, Czech & Swarovski Crystals, Agate
Moonstone, Agate and Handcrafted copper rings
Metal Me This, Micro- faceted Quartz & Czech Crystal
Copper Chainmaille cuff bracelet
with fantasy faceted quartz crystal and copper lined Czech
Larimar, Mystic Topaz, Aquamarine, Pearls
Larimar, Swarovski embellished pearls
Charoite cabochon in Chainmaille bezel,
carved amethyst flowers, charoite beads, Swarovski crystal.
Copper, amazonite, and copper lined beads
Metal Me This and HMB Lampwork
"Wisteria" Aquamarine focal, rose quartz & cherry quartz coins, faceted aquamarine briolettes and rose quartz briolettes
(faceted rose quartz gifted by Lori Anderson)
(faceted rose quartz gifted by Lori Anderson)
(faceted rose quartz gifted by Lori Anderson)
Chainmaille basket weave earrings with AB Chrysoprase
( beads gifted by Tina Holden of Beadcomber)
( beads gifted by Tina Holden of Beadcomber)
Forged copper rings (gifted by Nicole Weltsh)
gold leaves (gifted by Windbent)
Seraphinite (the gem with "angel wings") cabochon,
Swarovski crystal, seraphinite beads
Chainmaille bezel Half-Persian 3-1
(you'll find the bezel tutorial I helped with for free at Beads Baubles & Jewels )
The Artists
Our Hostess: 1. Lori Anderson, Pretty Things
3. Roxanne Mendoza, Roxi Designs
4. Melissa Trudinger, beadrecipes
5. Rana Lea, Rana Lea Designs
6. Perri Jackson, Shaktipaj Designs
7. Rita Avila, Jewel School Friends <--- You are here :)
8. Linda Anderson, From the Bead Board
10. Erin Guest, Renlish
11. Joan Williams, lilruby jewelry
12. Diane Hawkey, Diane Hawkey
13. Jo-Ann Woolverton, It's a Beadiful Creation
14. Sue Kennedy, SueBeads
15. Lisa Cone, Inspired Adornments
16. Kari Asbury, Hippie Chick Design
17. Nichole Byers, Nichole Byers
18. Lori Jean Poppe, Adventures in Creativity
19. Linda Landig, Linda's Bead Blog and Meanderings
20. Lori Schneider, Bead Addict
21. Molly Alexander, Beautifully Broken Me
22. Cece Cormier, The Beading Yogini
23. Niki Sayers, Silver Nik Nats
24. Elsie Deliz-Fonseca, Eliz-Eliz and All That Craft
25. Amber Dawn, Inventive Soul
26. Heather Powers, Humblebeads
27. Sarah Goode, Pookledo
28. Monique Urquhart, A Half-Baked Notion
29. JJ Jacobs, Coming Abstractions
30. Cheri Reed, Creative Designs by Cheri
31. Robyn, Museiddity
32. Catherine King, Catherine's Musings
33. Jacquie, Bead Gypsy
34. Janet McDonald, Singing Woods
35. Kay Thomerson, Kayz Kreations
36. Tanty Sri Hartanti, TJewellicious by Tanti
37. Hannah Rosner, Good River Valley
38. Rochelle Brisson, A Creative Chelle
39. Nelly May, Smelly Nelly
40. Skylar Bre'z, Brising Beads
41. Beti Horvath, Stringing Fool
42. Christie Murrow, Charis Designs
43. Leanne Loftus, First Impression Design
44. Valerie Norton, Hot Art
45. Judy Riggs, Rigglettes
46. Crystal Thain, Here Bead Dragons
47. Terry Carter, Tapping Flamingo
48. Sue, Mid-Life Great Expectations
49. Nan Smith, Wired Nan
50. Miranda Ackerley, MirandAck Arts
51. Marie Covert, Creating Interest
52. D'Arsie Manzella, This Here Now, Mamacita
53. Stephanie Haussler, Pixybug Designs
54. Lori Bergmann, Lori Bergmann Design
55. Johanna Nunez, The Lovely One Design
56. Mary Govaars, MLH Jewelry Designs
57. Becky Pancake, Becky Pancake Bead Designs
58. Alicia Marinache, All the Pretty Things
59. Debbie Rasmussen, A Little of This, A Little of That
60. Nat, Grubbi Ceramics
61. Marjorie Savill Linthwaite, Bennu Bird Rising
62. Cheryl McCloud, One Thing Leads to Another
63. Heather Otto, The Crafthopper
64. Candida Castleberry, Spun Sugar Beadworks
66. JuLee Wolfe, The Polymer Penguin
67. Ginger Bishop, Lil Mummy Likes
68. Karen Mitchell, Over the Moon Design
69. Jeannie Dukic, Jeannie's Blog
70. Dini Bruinsma, Angaza by Changes
71. Birgitta Lejonklou, Create With Spirit
72. Shalini Austin, Jewellery by Shalini
73. Jayne Capps, Mama's Got to Doodle
74. Ile Ruzza, Ilenia's Unique Beaded Jewelry
76. Annita Wilson, AW Jewelry
77. Sherri Stokey, Knot Just Macrame
78. Hannah Trost, PZ Designs
79. Linda Inhelder, Must Haves Jewelry
80. Miri Agassi, Beadwork
81. Hope Smitherman, Crafty Hope
82. Dyanne Cantrell, Dee-Liteful Jewelry Creations
83. Susan Bowie, Susan Nelson Bowie
84. Megan Milliken, MaeMaeMills
85. Menka Gupta, Menka's Jewelry
86. Ambra Gostoli, Chic and Frog
87. Lori Lochner, Bloghner
88. Gerda Jurimae, Gerda's Crafts Blog
89. Susan, Mistheword
90. MaryLou Holvenstot, MaryLou's time2cre8
91. Mary Shannon Hicks, falling into the sky
92. Karin King, The Sparklie Things Blog
93. Christa Murphy, Adventures of One Beady Woman
94. Jenny Davie-Reazor, Jenny Davies-Reazor
95. Donetta Farrington, Simply Gorgeous
96. Mallory Hoffman, Rosebud 101 - For the Love of Beads
97. Danielle Kelley, Imbue the Muse
98. Kym Hunter, Kym Hunter Designs
99. Dolores Rami, CraftyD's Creations
100. Marcia Dunne, 13 Alternatives
101. Marlene Cupo, Amazing Designs
102. Emma Todd, A Polymer Penchant
103. Wendy Holder, Jewelry by WendyLea
104. Michelle Escano, The Cabby Crafter
105. Louise Glazier, Lily and Jasmine Treasures
106. Dana Hickey, Wind Dancer Studios
107. Lennis Carter, windbent
108. Anne Betenson, Crystal River Beads
109. Audrey Belanger, Dreams of an Absolution
110. Lisa Stukel, Carefree Jewelry by Lisa
111. Janine Lucas, Travel Stories
112. Claire Lockwood, Something to Do With Your Hands
113. Kathy Engstrom, Catherine's Dreams
114. Paula Hisel, Simply Beadiful
115. Karla Morgan, Texas Pepper Jams
116. Mischelle Fanucchi, Micheladas Musings
117. Kim, Cianci Blue
118. Linda Sadler, Ida Louise Jewelry
119. Karen, Spokalulu
120. Jennifer LaVite, Dry Gulch Bead and Jewelry
121. Andrea Glick-Zenith, ZenithJade Creations
122. Karen Martinez, Fairies Market
123. Robin Reed, Artistry HCBD
124. Amy Bright, LABweorc
125. Jasvanti Patel, Jewels by Jasvanti
126. Tammie Everly, TTE Designs
127. Karin Slaton, Backstory Beads
128. Natalie Moten, Running Out of Thread
129. Sharyl McMillian-Nelson, Sharyl's Jewelry & Reflections
130. Jenny Kyrlach, Wonder and Whimsy
131. LiliKrist, Handmade by LilK
132. Jessica Klaaren, The Truth Space
133. Cynthia Abner, Created Treasures
134. Beth Emery, Stories by Indigo Heart
135. Heather Davis, Blissful Garden Beads
136. Jeanne, Gems by Jeanne Marie
137. Sandi Volpe, Sandi Volpe
138. Laren Dee Barton, Laren Dee Designs
139. Steph, Confessions of a Bead Hoarder
140. Carolyn Lawson, Carolyn's Creations
141. B. R. Kuhlman, Mixed Mayhem
142. Patty Miller, Cabari Beads
143. Elizabeth Bunn, Elizabeth Beads
144. Marianna Boylan, Pretty Shiny Things
145. Lizzie Clarke, The Need to Bead
146. Christina Miles, Wings 'n' Scales
147. Patricia, The Color of Dreams
148. Marde Lowe, Fancimar
149. Ev Shelby, Raindrop Creations
150. Sarah Small, By Salla
151. Perri Jackson, Shaktipaj Designs
152. Laurie Vyselaar, Lefthand Jewelry
153. Pam Traub, Klassy Joolz
154. Lisa Harrison, Daisy Meadow Studio
155. Anzia Parks, Anzi-Panzi's Work Shoppe
156. Ingrid, Lilisgems Handcrafted Jewelry Inspirations
157. Andra Weber, Andra's Joyful Journey
158. Kelly Hosford Patterson, The Traveling Side Show
159. Adlinah Kamsir, Dreamstruck Designs
160. Marci, That Nothing Be Wasted
161. Kris Lanae Binsfield, Cherish Designs
162. Stephanie Perry, Mustard Bead
163. Birgit Klughardt, Gites Beads
164. Inge von Roos, Inge's Blog
165. Rebecca Sirevaag, Becca's Place
166. Sandy Markley, Gypsy Spirit Designs
167. Elena Adams, Lena's Beady Blog
Toltec Jewels is an author by day, jewelry maker by night. Her literary work is housed by the San Francisco MOMA and is published internationally in popular magazines, literary quarterlies, and university publications. She has won a number of awards for literary and jewelry arts. She is happiest making handcrafted jewelry with her entire family, snuggling with her doggies and grandkids, sewing, singing, reading, and learning jewelry techniques. She is the host of Jewel School Friends, a community of expert and emerging artisans taking inspiration from each other and Jewel School. Join her for fundraising for Beads of Courage, jewelry making challenges, contests, give-a-ways and of course, cool beads and jewelry!